When Love meets Pride, ON HIATUS
by schattentinte
Summary: AU/AH: Love, passion, adventure and a little bit danger. Elena doesn't know that she desires a relationship with these aspects. She is truly believing that she's happy with her boyfriend Stefan and already looking forward to their life after high school graduation. Caroline is trying to talk some sense into her friend but Elena doesn't listen. So she has to find out for herself ...
1. Prologue

**AN#2: Hey readers!  
I edited the prologue and added a few pieces of information and corrected some spelling mistakes – sorry for them!  
~ Ria  
**

 **AN: Hey readers!  
This is my first attempt to write a fanfiction and also to write something in english. I hope you are not too disappointed with my spelling and grammar. If you detect mistakes, feel free to send me a pm—maybe even with a grammar explanation. 'Cause I'm out of school since I think now about five years, I honestly forgot most of my lessons and my whole knowledge about the english language is self-taught. Enough about me, let's talk about the upcoming story: I am head over heels and madly in love with the tv-series »Vampire Diaries« and rooting for precious Delena since the first episode. Even after the end of the tv-series I can't get enough of this exceptional pair. So the story is obviously about these two and their way to get together. But I wanna try to write an AU/AH fiction. I suppose the story will cover a few years of their lives.  
**

 **Pairings i.a. in the first few chapters:  
** **Datherine (Damon & Katherine)**  
 **Stelena (Stefan & Elena)**  
 **Forwood (Tyler & Caroline)  
**

 **Alaric (30) is a history teacher at Mystic Falls High School since 2008. Jenna (29) is a research associate at Whitmore College and currently lives with Grayson and Miranda. Elena's parents are therefore alive and also her biological parents. Damon (22), Enzo (23) and Klaus (23) are students at Whitmore College and are connected through a special hate-love-friendship. Of course, Damon and Stefan are brothers in this story and their parents Lilian and Guiseppe are still alive. Though they have a sister, Sarah (20), who also studies at Whitmore College. Also Elijah (21) is a student, younger brother to Klaus and older brother to Rebekah. Katherine (20) is a student at Whitmore College and the daughter of John and Isobel. She is Elena's and Jeremy's cousin. Elena and Katherine share similar looks like the eye and hair color, but they are by no means identical—they cannot(!) be mistaken for each other. Elena (17), Bonnie (17) and Caroline (17) are high school students at Mystic Falls High School and have been close friends since childhood. Their friends and school colleagues in the senior year include Stefan (17), Tyler (17) and Matt (17). Elena and Matt were never a couple. Instead she is dating Stefan. Jeremy (15), the twins Olivia and Luke (15), Rebekah (15) and Valerie (15) are also students at Mystic Falls High School, currently in their sophomore year and good friends.  
**

 **I hope you enjoy and if you do so, please review!**  
 **~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
** **All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **PROLOGUE**

SEPTEMBER 5, 2009

Dear Diary!  
The last year in High School had started and I must confess I'm really looking forward to it.  
Stefan and I made a lot of plans. After graduation we're planning to attend the Whitmore College together to have the continuing ability to be actually together.  
Care just rolled her eyes on me. But I don't care what she thinks about us and our relationship. Stefan and I—  


»Elena!« Mirandas voice sounded from below, interrupting the dark-haired girl in her writing flow. Her head still in the clouds, she looked up und lightly shook her head for a moment to return to reality.

»What's wrong, Mum?« Elena shouted, putting her fountain pen down. A slight knock on the half open door only a few moments later announced the presence of her mother and the dark-haired girl turned her head. A questioning look appeared on her face as Miranda entered her daughter's room.

»Elena—didn't you want to go to the bonfire with Jeremy?« The girl nodded approvingly.

»Well, then you're too late. He left the house just minutes ago,« Miranda declared chuckling. »Your lost track of time,« she said, looking at the open diary but without trying to the read the written words. »Sometimes I wish I had not given you your first diary. I know—I said that writing your memories and your thoughts down is balm for the soul. But don't forget to talk with actual people, honey. Blank pages are good listeners, but you don't get answers.« It was an unspoken request. Miranda gave her girl an encouraging smile and waited for a moment. After all, she was about to turn around when the dark-haired girl spoke, »Mum?«

»Yes, honey?«

»I … Caroline thinks it's … no … she thinks I am ridiculous when I talk about Stefan and me wanting to stay together after the graduation. She thinks we aren't a match. That it will not last. She has no confidence in me or rather in us and our relationship. Maybe just not in Stefan. Care begrudges me to be happy because she was fond of Stefan … and I knew it when I started to date him,« Elena sighed and lowered her gaze. She focussed on her intertwined fingers and heard her mother sigh as well.

»Oh darling,« she talked gently, stepping up to her daughter, placing a finger under her chin and raising her face to look into Elena's eyes. »Caroline will get over it. I'm sure. The question is—what do you want? What's more important to you? To get approval from your friend or to be happy with Stefan?« Elena nibbled at her lower lip and finally whispered, »I don't know Mum … I don't know. I want both but I don't want to hurt anyone along the way.«

Miranda smiled sympathetically, her green eyes full of compassion, »I'm sure everything will turn out well. You'll see. Don't worry so much!« With these words the dark-haired woman kissed her daughter's forehead and left the room with a face full of cares. Elena didn't notice 'cause she had already begun to complete the sentence in her diary:

—will make it. We will last, even if someone put obstacles in our way. I'm absolutely secure about my feelings towards him and I know he feels the same way.


	2. 1: You've got the love I need

**AN: Hey readers!**  
 **Some chapters of this story are already sketched and 'cause I really wanted to write to today, I can present you the first real chapter as an apology for the short prologue. At the moment the chapters will be generally shorter. As soon as the story gets more into the plot, the chapters will automatically extend. In advance I want to say sorry for all of the Stelena and Datherine action in the upcoming chapters but it's necessary for the story. So please don't complain about it (; But I promise one thing: Stelena will only last about to ten chapters. It's a long way for Delena and I hope that the bright outlook to their happy ending—as long as it will take 'cause there are massive obstacles—will put you in a peaceable mood. In the following chapter the both of them will have a scene together.**  
 **With this in mind, I hope you enjoy and if you do so, please review! I also wanna thank those readers who gave the story an alert after just one short prologue and those who reviewed. Have fun!**  
 **~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER ONE**  
 _You've got the love I need_  
– Florence & The Machine / You've Got the Love –

SEPTEMBER 5, 2009

Elena looked at the final words in her diary and a pleased smile appeared on her face. Caroline's opinions wouldn't make her evening miserable. Her friend's view was very important to her but the brief conversation with her mother had shown her once more that she shouldn't let Cares influence gain the upper hand. Elena suffered enough just knowing that the bubbly blonde doesn't support her relationship. But she wouldn't sacrifice an evening like today. It was time to celebrate … the new school year and her anniversary with Stefan.

A quick glance at the clock was enough to notice that Jeremy had left the house an hour too early and while she reached for her cellphone, she frowned—considering wherever and with whom he would spend time meanwhile. Sometimes, no usually she didn't understand her brother. His motives were not comprehensible and he never made any arrangements to explain himself. He always looked for excuses for his behavior. And yet, there were so close in the past. Something had changed and Elena can't even imagine why and what. His vagarious mood had shown today—Jeremy became more and more unreliable. The sole moments to talk to him were these in the morning when the two of them were standing simultaneously in the bathroom to brush their teeth. However their mouthes were full of toothpaste and they couldn't communicate either.

Elena pressed Bonnie's speed dial number and hadn't to wait for two-seconds until she heard a squeaky greeting on the other end of the line.

» _Lena! Are you ready for tonight?_ « Bonnie asked gleefully.

»Honestly, not really,« Elena sighed, then continued to speak, »Jeremy had already gone, I have no ride and the worst thing is,« she paused dramatically, »I still don't know what to wear!« Bonnie laughed highly and the sound made Elena smile.

» _Two of your problems can be solved immediately,_ « Bonnie promised, » _I'll be there in about ten minutes to save you!_ «

»Thank you!«

Bonnie entered punctual als always the Gilbert's house, waved at Miranda and climbed upstairs to Elena's room. »I'm here!« The dark-skinned girl shouted, looking at a mountain of clothes laying scattered on the bed. »Oh my,« she murmured to herself as her friend's head extended out of the bathroom. She answered with a raised eyebrow, »I heard that. I thought you would help me? Instead you judge me for the chaos I had to cause because you took an amount of ten minutes before you came to safe my fashionable life,« A smile spread over her face as she spoke, she entered the room and pulled Bonnie into a tight hug.

»It is good to see you!« The dark-haired girl said. Elena released Bonnie from the embrace but kept her hands on Bonnie's shoulders and looked over her. The girl noticed her taxing, but approving gaze, waiting for her friend's comment.

»You look great! Now your only task is to help me look just as great as you.« Bonnie smiled gratefully and nodded gently before she shook her friend's hands from her shoulders and turned to the reams of clothes. Her gaze scanned them, while the corner of her mouth raised and then lowered again when she rejected another idea. It took only a few moments before the dark-skinned girl finally spoke, »A white basic T-Shirt, the cute red plaid blouse over there,« her hand pointed to a not crinkled piece of clothing on the top of the mountain, »and black jeans, your chucks and the beige leather jacket you bought two month ago. Simple but effective and without betraying your style. Do you approve?« A questioning expression laid in her eyes when she fixed her gaze on Elena. But those expressed her approval by an enthusiastic nod, snatched the blouse and rummaged through her half-full wardrobe looking for a clean white shirt. Meanwhile Bonnie laid down on the free space on Elena's bed.

»A year, huh?«

»What?« Elena's head emerged from the closet and she cast a questioning glance towards Bonnie.

»Well, you and Stefan!« She said.

»Oh,« Elena straightened up with a white shirt in her hand, »yes, I can hardly believe it. Sometimes it feels like an eternity, sometimes as if we were only together since yesterday. Time flies so fast.« The girl shrugged but smiled happily. Bonnie laughed silently. She knew it wasn't easy for Elena 'cause a third of their trio wasn't so enthusiastic about her relationship. She could understand Carolines point of view on the one hand but if one looked at Elena and Stefan, one couldn't just be not happy about their luck. Bonnie had never liked to sit on the fence and decide between sides and god knows, she had often been about to explode when Caroline and Elena were at loggerheads, but she had never decided between them. Thus, she didn't share either of the two opinions a hundred percent. At least not when the three of them were spending time together.

»The faster time flies, the faster we get to college,« Bonnie joked and Elena rolled her eyes amused before she began to change. Bonnie's choice was really the right one once she looked into the mirror and mentally argued how many buttons she could left undone.

»Honestly—I'm happy for you,« Bonnie said, still sprawled on the bed, while Elena gave her subtle make-up the finishing touch.

»That's very kind of you!« The peach-colored rouge made a feature of her cheekbones and Elena turned her head so she could look at her profile before she grabbed her colorless lip gloss.

»When is Stefan arriving at the bonfire?«

Elena looked at her bracelet watch and opened the lip gloss. »Probably two hours later than us. He said he needed time to manage something.« She applied a thin layer and looked at herself.

»He is definitely on his way to get you a present,« Bonnie thought, »or he is struggling with his hair-style.« It was quiet for a moment. Elena glanced through the mirror of her vanity back to Bonnie and pressed her lips tightly together before the to girls broke simultaneously into hysterical laughter.

»Why do you always have to tease him because of his hair?« Elena asked giggly. Bonnie just shrugged and grinned broadly.

»He makes it too easy for us,« she admitted. Elena smiled and removed a stray of her dark-brown hair from her sticky lips.

»I think I'm not into lip gloss tonight,« She chuckled and took a face tissue to clean her lips.

»I guess lipstick is also off the table. Except you would like to leave your marks.« The saucy comment didn't fail to have the desired effect 'cause Elena burst into highly laughing and shook her head fiercely.

»I would like to spare me the embarrassment.«

»Can't blame you for that,« Bonnie sat up and checked her cellphone briefly.

»You ready?« She asked. After a last glance into the mirror Elena turned and smiled broadly, »Your thoughts?« Her voice sounded a bit insecure because the ambition to look absolutely stunning today was great, although she couldn't get the chance to wear something fancy and sassy. But Bonnie's encouraging smile was approval enough for the dark-haired girl.

»Stefan will not be able to keep his eyes … and his hands off of you. Seriously—you look fantastic. He will be thrilled if he lay eyes on you. But something's missing …« A frown attended Bonnies words and she got up to approach the vanity. Her gaze scanned the scattered things and found those which she was looking for eventually.

»Perfect,« She murmured and grabbed the silver ear studs with a little red gem on each of them. »As well this simple bracelet,« She pointed at a thin and silver circlet, »and your appearance is complete.« Elena put the picked jewellery on and nodded, »I'd say we are ready!«

When the girls arrived just twenty minutes later in the woods, the sun began to set slowly and the reddish orange dusk announced the evening. An overview revealed that not only the students of Mystic Falls High took the chance to celebrate. Elena was able to see her cousin Katherine in the distance and Stefan's older sister Sarah sat with a blue cup near the bonfire and talked to a young man Elena didn't recognise. Bonnie however spotted Caroline and pulled the dark-haired girl to her mutual friend.  
»Care!« she called, a few metres from the blonde and the girl who had been addressed turned around and ran towards the friends.

»Girls—finally! I thought you don't show up at all. I've been here for an eternity and I've had to grapple around with those idiots who call themselves our friends,« She hugged them tightly. »We have to celebrate the last school year,« A dreamy expression appeared in Caroline's eyes, »I promise you it will be stunning! We are now Seniors. We have to clink glasses! Where are your drinks? Come on, chop-chop! We don't have an eternity!« A chuckle escaped Elena as she looked at Caroline and she raised an eyebrow amused.

»Sentimental and a little hasty, huh?« She sounded, breaking away from the group hug. The blonde rolled her eyes, the annoyed face more acted than truthful.

»Maybe. A little … but actually just in the mood to celebrate. Come on, get something to drink. We don't want to miss the whole paaarty,« Caroline said in her typical sing-song.

»Come on,« Bonnie said laughing, »before she busts our chops.«

 **An hour and 15 minutes later …**

For about fifteen minutes Elena tried to locate Jeremy but nobody had seen him. Her frustrated expression shouldn't be mistaken for anger, though she could feel this familiar and hot gut feeling. However, she was much more disappointed and concerned. Her brother tended to act impulsively and Elena wasn't sure if he knew or wanted to know such thing like responsibility. Disillusioned she gave up the search after another ten minutes. He had probably never been here at all and had only used the celebration as an excuse to be somewhere else.

Aimless, Elena wandered through the crowd of celebrating people, anxious not to attract attention and to find a place of restful peace. She didn't really want to go back to Bonnie and Caroline since previously the blonde had addressed the Stefan-issue again and the young woman didn't want her evening and anniversary to be destroyed. She had absolutely no desire to argue about that and because Care already was slightly drunk, not even peaceful Bonnie could keep her friend from declaring her opinion. Elena simply didn't understand why Caroline was acting like that. She was happy herself. Why couldn't she not begrudge Elena her happiness and offer her the support that she received regarding Tyler. Somehow Elena had to by-pass the time until Stefan will arrive and everything will change for the better. She moved towards the edge of the forest and thus the hoped-for peace with a deep sigh when she heard outraged voices.

»Damn Kat—stay put!«

Elena turned her head towards the displeased exclamation and briefly hesitated before she stopped walking.

»What do you want, Damon?« She recognised immediately her cousin's voice. »Isn't it enough for you to have young girls dance around on your lap? Shall I join so you can have an evening with a happy and pleasant end?« While the voice clearly boiled with rage there was also an undertone of grief and Elena couldn't help but felt sorry for her cousin. Although the two young women were not really close and also didn't get along among themselves, they were family and nobody deserved this. Elena knew, even though Katherine didn't talk to her about it—if she talked with anyone at all—, Damon hurt her again and again. Rumours travel fast and Damon was one of those men who constantly drew attention to oneself by the use of rumours. Probably this was in his own interest. Therefore she couldn't understand her cousin's relationship with this _demon_. The dark-haired girl despised Stefan's brother deeply: He was everything beside a good man. Arrogance, selfishness and narcism were only three of the facets which made him despicable. And yet, Katherine was with him and obviously loved him—otherwise she might not accept his bad sides as she does and still stay with him. Even though she couldn't comprehend this kind of love, she admired her cousin's determination and devotion to Damon. But Elena often wondered if this consuming love was healthy.

Elena didn't want to spy. Even less she wanted to watch the scene not far from her. But for incomprehensible reasons she couldn't look away from those two people standing there at the edge of the forest. Damon had a firm and brutal lock on her cousin's upper arm and prevented her from running.

»Damn it Katherine,« Damon barked at the young woman, pulling her closer by her arm but she just angrily flashed back.

»Let. Me. Go. Immediately. You're hurting me, Damon!« She vehemently tried to shake off the man's grasp but was unable to do so. »Oh, I forgot«, she mocked bitchy, »this is funny for you, you wretched sadist. I said: Let. Me. Go!« She nearly spat those last words in his face.

Elena, a few metres away, stood glued to the spot and her heart ached for Katherine.

»Let me explain!«

»What's to explain, Damon? You wanna deny the things I've seen?« The grief in Katherine's voice was now clearly recognisable and Elena swallowed hard. She tried to get rid oft the lump in her throat. Again Katherine tried to shake off his hand and he gave in. His arms hung now almost powerless beside his body. Katherine rubbed the sore spot where he had held her and purred, on one side hostile and on one side eagerly awaiting an answer, »What have I ever done to you to treat me so?«

Damon uttered a frustrated sound and admitted: »You're driving me crazy, Kat. That's what you've done!«

She laughed mockingly, »So now it's my fault that you were trying to make out with minors? It's so typical, Damon. So typical! Just handle your life already. I'm done with you—irreversible!« With these harsh words, Katherine turned on her heel and disappeared into the forest like a scaled cat. Damon grumbled deep inside, hauled off and hammered his fist at a nearby tree. »Fucking hell! Damn! What fucking shit!«, he fiercely blurted out, his voice dark and sinister. And then he turned abruptly, looked Elena directly into her eyes and his face twisted into a hollow grimace. Elena's heart thumped like mad as she backed off anxiously, an apologizing and pleading expression in her eyes.

»I … it … I mean …«, she began desperately as Damon approached. His gaze was hard and unyielding and no coherent sentence would leave Elena's mouth. The icy blue eyes pierced into her's. While they seemed inscrutable, Elena saw the roller coaster of emotions in them.


	3. 2: The ice inside your soul

**AN: Hey readers!**  
 **In advance I'd like to say that not everything is as it seems. Damon isn't the antichrist and Katherine isn't an angel but wait and see.**  
 **I hope you enjoy and remember: Reviews are love!  
~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:**  
 **All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.**  
 **Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWO**  
 _The ice inside your soul_  
– Christina Perri / Jar of Hearts –

SEPTEMBER 5, 2009

First of all, she saw the pain and suddenly her fear disappeared. Earlier she had felt with Katherine, felt her suffering like a sister in mind. Now she was lost in the dark abyss of Damon's torments. She was lost in the mesmerizing storm of his azure eyes. She recognised how much Katherine's words had hurt him and at the same moment Elena wondered why: Katherine had only stated the truth about his failures and named and shamed him therefor. Before she had the chance to finish this thought, the rage manifested itself. It swallowed the pain, blazed away like fire in his eyes and Elena instantly got goose bumps over her arms. She knew she should be afraid because it would be the logical response to a hostile expression like this. Still, she couldn't prevent a hint of sympathy in her gaze when she backed off again. But for every step she did Damon came two steps closer and her sympathy seemed to stir up his anger.

»Who the hell,« he growled hotheaded, »do you think you are, little Gilbert-girl?«

Damon cornered Elena without her noticing. The dark-haired girl collided with a trunk while taking her next step backwards and a low groan escaped her in consequence of the unwanted crash. She turned her gaze to the man in front of her and couldn't forbear that the blazing wrath in his eyes made him look diabolically handsome. The Salvatore-gene of an impressive appearance had not passed by Damon. Rather it had manifested itself in its perfection. Elena pushed this thought terrified to the back of her mind and was almost disgusted with herself. How was it anyway possible for her to think in such a moment that Damon was even rudimentarily attractive to her? He had broken Katherine's heart. He had forced her to give up her devotion and relationship. He had hurt her—both mentally and physically by his way to prevent her escaping—and if she could read one thing between the lines of the words of her cousin then that wasn't the first time he did this. He wasn't a good man. Damon wasn't a good person. She should be fucking scared of him. And then her fear came suddenly back.

»Lurking around the woods and spy upon people. Is your oh so wonderful relationship with my brother so damn boring that you have to lech over the suffering of others?« Damon snorted angrily and disgusted, his voice dripping with venom. »Does Saint Stefan really have so little to offer?«

Elena's newfound fear and the spark of sympathy abruptly turned into outrage as Damon involved his brother and therefore her boyfriend into the subject. The dark-haired girl pushed herself off the trunk. She stood straight, focused her cloudy gaze on him and gathered all her courage.

»If I were you, I'd take back what you just said,« she spoke slowly, trying hard to keep her voice calm and distant, but in reality her words sounded squeezed. The thoughts rushed through her head. Katherine was right: He liked to inflict pain on others. She couldn't understand his spitefulness. Elena wasn't aware of anything she had done that would justify a temperamental outburst like this. Yes, she had been in the wrong place at the wrong time and yes, she had seen a confrontation she would rather not have watched but for heaven's sake—they were in the middle of a party even though a few metres away from the main action. Anyone could have walked in Katherine's and Damon's fight. Anyone! However, _she_ had walked in and the man in front of her used this as an opportunity to wreak his hatred.

»And when I won't take it back?« Damon laughed mockingly. And then what? He was clearly superior as he stood in front of her like a predator on the hunt. And Elena was his prey. She had not the slightest chance to escape neither him nor his rage. And the hopelessness of her situation made her reckless. Unlike Katherine she had nothing to lose: no friendship, no relationship, no love. A confrontation with Damon wouldn't destroy anything because there was nothing except the mutual disgust.

»I'm not threatening you,« Elena explained, knowing deep inside that this would only rile him further up. »I will not even tell you what I think of you because you don't deserve this. You deserve nothing. Katherine gave you everything—« Elena didn't think the mention of her cousin could be the final straw, »—and you destroyed it. Destroyed everything.« Her voice broke as the scope of her message became clear to her and her eyes widened. But Damon laughed, although the noises which rose his throat were by no means beautiful. It was a disastrous laugh, a sinister almost cruel one. One that showed her clearly that her words meant utterly nothing to him.

»What do _you_ know about Katherine and me, little Gilbert-girl?« Damon spat, »You don't know me nor do you know Katherine. If you had only a hazy notion, you would have been over the hills and far away, seeking for safe-hold and comfort in Stefan's arms.«

»Keep Stefan out of this. He has nothing to do with the whole thing,« Elena hit back, trying to come to her boyfriend's defence.

»He doesn't? Are you positive about that, little Gilbert-girl?« A dubious twinkle appeared in Damon's azure eyes which made Elena insecure beyond compare. Suddenly he took a step back and gave her space to breathe, to think. She was confused.

»What are you trying to imply here, Damon?« The words left her mouth more hastily and uncertain than she wished and they made him laugh at her. »Stefan didn't do anything to you—he's not even here. He would never stoop to your level. He's a good man. _Stefan_ actually cares about the feelings of other people.« He frowned as if he thought about answering her at all.

»The truth, Elena. The all-encompassing truth. No more and no less.«

The girl swallowed and her eyes widened.

»I don't like to repeat myself but you know nothing. Not even about my little brother. But perhaps that is it what make you seem so attractive to him—« he raised his hand slowly and his thumb whisked almost tenderly over Elena's cheek and stopped at her lower lip, which was now trembling. The dark-haired girl tried with all might not to flinch, not to let him win. But the anxiety in her eyes was now clearly visible. The dilated pupils replaced the dark chocolate brown almost entirely. »—your naiveté, the innocence and your pure heart. Your desire for bringing out the good in all men.« His eyes were lingering on her lips which his thumb caressed gently.

»This was exactly what he needed after Kat. But I don't understand how to appreciate someone like you, if you have already tasted our marvelous Katherine.«

Elena gasped for air and at the same moment Damon's fingers left her face. Something clenched her heart tightly and squeezed without mercy. It took her ability to breathe. Damon gave her a wicked and smug smirk. The storm in his blue eyes had calmed down and Elena could only see those terrible depths of deadness as if he had pushed a button to suppress all his feelings and the sight corrupted her breathlessness. With a last icy glance, Damon turned and disappeared into the forest without saying another word. He left her alone with her doubts, with her thoughts. He had reached his goals. And Elena sank to the ground, hysterically fighting for air and trembling like an aspen leaf. _Monster_. On the verge of tears, she put her head back and tried to stop them from falling. But the water continued to rise. It left steadily the harbor of her eyes, ran down on the sides of her face. She blinked and tried to stop the sobbing which wanted to escape from the depths of her throat. Elena threw her hands up in front of her face and bit hard into the base of her thumb until she tasted blood so she didn't make any noise. _What had she done to him? What had Stefan done to him?_

A few minutes later, Elena had composed herself so far that she could try to digest Damon's words. But every time she wanted to channel her thoughts in this direction the breathlessness came back and a hot gut feeling emerged. Finally, the dark-haired girl pulled herself up on the trunk and abutted against it as weak as a kitten. What's happened here? She tried to calm herself and her nerves down by taking deep breathes and exhale them afterwards. She seemed to achieve success at least. But she didn't know what to think. Damon's statements had been to disturbing, too hurtful. She doubted the truth in his words. She knew Stefan and she knew he was a sincere man. The accusations of his brother could never be true. This was all Damon: a wounded man who was obsessed about making others suffer.

It took another ten minutes for Elena to be able to leave this place where she originally wanted to find peace. Her heartstrings were still agitated and upset but she couldn't stay away longer without attracting the attention of Bonnie and Caroline by her absence. Back at the party, Elena edged herself through the crowd to the bar and allowed herself a beer. She already tried to erase the traces of her tears but a brunette girl eyed her with irritation.

»Did you cry?« She asked gently.

Elena pointed at herself and smiled. Then she shook her head and said, »No, but some crap from the trees got into my eyes when they were shaken earlier.« The lie passed her lips to easy and she was ashamed.

»Oh—« the girl laughed, »—yes, that happens sometimes. Certainly it was Tyler. He went wild today.« She rolled her eyes amused and came nearer towards Elena. »Wait, I have a mirror with me.« She rummaged briefly through her purse before pulling out a pocket mirror and a handkerchief. The girl handed both items to Elena who immediately began to remove the rest of her dissolved make-up. Fortunately, the damage was minimal and after cleansing her face nothing would indicate that she had cried.

»I'm Jules, by the way—« The brunette said when Elena passed the mirror back to her and flashed her a grateful smile, »—Tyler's cousin.«

An honest and pleased smile spread to Elena's lips. »I'm Elena—glad to meet you and thanks again for your help. But, I didn't know Tyler had a cousin?«

Jules shrugged, smiled wryly and crooked her head. »Our fathers are on bad terms but my dad obviously recognised that the family is somehow important after the death of my mum. That's why I'm here.«

»I'm sorry for your loss,« Elena said while lowering her eyes but Jules just smiled and shrugged again.

»We were not really close. You don't have to—«

»Elena!« Caroline's all-too-familiar voice drowned the scene at that moment and with Bonnie in tow she headed her way to her friend. Elena threw an apologising glance at Jules but she only chuckled.

»We've been looking for you, Elena. Wheeere were you?« The voice of the wasted Caroline was reproachful. Her lips were pursed and she looked at her with puppy-eyes. Elena couldn't help but laughed and Bonnie murmured a soft ›sorry‹ towards Jules.

»Care, how many drinks did you have?« Elena giggled, happy with the distraction from her thoughts, even if the distraction came in form of the bubbly and obviously offended Caroline.

»Nothing much. Don't be such a buzzkill, Gilbert. A couple of beers and a little bit of vodka. Well, maybe not just a little bit,« the blonde replied sulky but with a chuckle and her chin feisty jutting out. Her face brightened in seconds when she recognised Jules next to Elena. Before anybody could react she flung her arms spirited around Jules neck and squeaked, »Jules! I'm so glad to see you!« The girl caught her in her arms for a moment before shoving her gently but certain off.

»For Chrissake Caroline!« Jules laughed, »You're as vibrant as ever. Even in your somewhat deranged condition.«

»Can anybody enlighten me?« Bonnie smiled but she obviously felt ignored and couldn't understand the joy of reunion.

»Jules meet Booonnie. Bonnie meet Juuules.« Caroline seized the opportunity and waved her hands around in the girl's faces. This, and Care's bright ›Oops‹ as she staggered, made Elena laugh. She turned to Bonnie and explained while Jules tried to steady the wasted Caroline, »Jules is Tyler's cousin.«

»Ah!« Bonnie nodded understandingly. »That explains the enthusiasm with wich Care hogs her.« Elena smiled in acknowledgment and turned her ganze towards the other two girls.

»Well then, are you doing okay?«

»I neeever felt better!« Caroline squealed but the reproachful look from before had returned to her eyes. »But you missed all the fun, Elena. Wheeere were you? It's not very nice to leave your friends alone,« the blonde pouted and staggered slightly. Jules, however, had a firm grip on her.

»But honestly Elena,« Bonnie said, »where on earth were you? You were untraceable!«

Elena shrugged, an apologetic smile on her lips.

»I was everywhere and nowhere … I was looking for Jeremy but nobody saw him. Obviously he never made an appearance at the party.« She frowned. There was no need to tell her friends—and Jules— about the confrontation with Damon. She couldn't even explain it to herself. How should she put into words what had happened? And if she was honest with herself, she didn't want to think about it any more and push the encounter to the back of her mind; including Damon's accusations against Stefan and her emotional breakdown afterwards. It embarrassed her and the whole story were by no means fodder for party-conversation. Had she not sworn earlier today that nothing would ruin her evening? But it was about Caroline and her opinions and how she always seemed to rub those in her face.

»Forget about Jeremy!« Caroline demanded insensitive and somehow without the drunken sing-song. »We are here to have fun. If your little brother wants to have fun elsewhere, it is his decision and also his problem. Not yours.«

»Caroline!« Bonnie shouted indignant, giving her a warning look. But the bubbly blonde just rolled her eyes on Bonnie and nagged, »Well, it's true. She's not his mother …« She addressed Caroline, her tone almost insulting, »Get the hang of your maternal instinct, Elena. You knew how to have fun. But Stefan's broody manner probably rubbed off on you.«

»Caroline, it's enough!« Jules intercalated calmly, the blonde-haired girl still gently embracing to save her from falling. »You're drunk and you don't know what you're saying!«

»I may have drank too much but I know very well what I'm saying!« Caroline raised her voice which suddenly sounded sober and flashed at Elena, »It's true. Ever since you've been with Stefan I saw your changes. You're no longer the high spirited, adventurous, volatile and feisty Elena which I love so much. People can hardly have fun with you, because the only things you care about are responsibility and your ›planning for the future‹.« To illustrate her words, Caroline painted quotation marks into the air and rolled her eyes annoyed.

»I don't have to listen to this,« Elena said defensively. The queasy feeling in her stomach was tighter then before and lump in her throat was noticeable. She struggled to keep her composure and don't scream at her friend or to break out in tears or even both. But Caroline just went on and on. She didn't think about relinquishing her plan. She knew she would feel bad tomorrow because of the way she talked to her best friend … no, probably she would feel bad in about ten minutes, but someone had to take this cheerless task and talk some sense into her. The blonde shook vehemently Jules' arms off, ignored Bonnie's pleading glances and took a step towards Elena. Hard blue-green eyes met wounded chocolate-brown ones and Caroline flinched but didn't think about giving up.

»Stefan isn't doing you good. You refuse to see it, damn it. You changed your entire personality for one single man who has not even earned you!« Caroline tried to bring Elena her point to mind as she suddenly heard a noise behind her like someone's clearing his throat and she frightened. The blonde turned around slowly, liftet her gaze with pursed lips, resigned and tried to look as innocent as possible.

»Stefan!« An uncertain smile appeared on her lips as Elena edged herself past her and staggered into the inviting arms of her boyfriend. Caroline slouched her shoulders powerless und exhaled noisy. She wouldn't give up. There had to be a way to convince Elena that she was making a mistake. That she wouldn't be happy with a life just to live up to wishes and expectations of Stefan. So Caroline didn't back off or tried to take the previously spoken words back. The damage was caused.

»Always the knight in shining armor,« she said snappy before she caught sight of Elena and began to chew on her lower lip, despite her inner fortitude.

»Elena, I …«

»Don't waste your breath, Caroline. You said enough …« The dark-haired girl spoke softly as Stefan circled her waist and tightened his hold on her. He was here. He was there for her. Stefan made everything better—even if Caroline disagreed. The lump in her throat disappeared instantly and she felt safe in his arms. Elena looked up and flashed him a small, grateful smile which caused his forest-green eyes to light up lovingly. He pressed a soft kiss on her crown before he stared at the three girls standing in front of him. He addressed Jules with and friendly and peaceful smile, »I think we don't know each other yet. I'm Stefan Salvatore, Elena's boyfriend.«

Cocky but not unfriendly—rather amused—Jules replied, »The knight in shining amor. I thought so. I'm Jules. Jules Lockwood, Tyler's cousin.«

»Glad to meet you, Jules. Even if the situation is not quite as good as it might have been.« A small side glance at Caroline followed though Stefan punished her with disregard and Jules chuckled softly.

»Bonnie—also nice to see you!«

»Likewise, Stefan.«

»I hope you don't mind if I abduct Elena for the rest of the evening?«

Before anybody could answer, Caroline snorted loudly, arms akimbo and fixed her gaze on the pair with eyes brimmed over with frustration. »I'm not sorry!« She huffed loudly and grasped Bonnie's and Jules' lower arms firmly, pulling them both relentlessly away from Stefan and Elena.

The dark-haired girl leaned distressed against Stefan, hid her face on his chest and sighed sadly. Could today be worse?

»I'm sorry you had to see this.«

»I thought it was better already?«

She looked up and swallowed before she shrugged uncertainly and crooked her head.

»Mostly. But today—well, you heard her.« Another sigh escaped her. Stefan raised his hands and gripped her face gently as Elena shrank back unintentionally and remembered that Damon had already touched these places today.

»I … I'm so sorry.« Her voice trembled and for the second time in a very short time, her eyes blurred.

»Sh, Elena. Don't allow her words to hurt you so much. You know, what she said isn't true,« Stefan said soothingly to the dark-haired girl, pulling her to his chest again, embracing her body with one arm and squeezed her thoughtful. Meanwhile, his second hand stroked slowly and comforting through her dark-brown hair and he tried to caress her worries away. Elena needed a few minutes to calm down and she fiercely blinked her tears away. Her hands clung tightly to Stefan's T-shirt and as his caress stopped she looked up, her eyes blearily. His sympathetic smile relaxed the girl.

»I love you,« she whispered softly, knowing that Stefan had heard her.


	4. 3: We both need to wake up

**AN: Hey readers!  
I would like to apologize for the long waiting time. Since I'm currently writing my two final papers for the university and I've started a new part-time job a few weeks ago, I can't regularly work on WLMP at the moment. Even if the content of the next few chapters are already outlined, they still have to be written and translated as this fanfiction is written in the german and the english language. I try to update at regular intervals but a weekly chapter is impossible for the nearer future. I try to update at least one time per month. When my private life has itself re-established it will be more often.**

 **Hang on, Stelena doesn't exist any longer and you don't have to endure intimate scenes. However, I warn all readers: In the following chapter are Datherine-scenes. If you don't want to read it, skip it. I'll label it with # before and after that for you. Please don't worry about the current couple constellation. As mentioned, it is necessary for the progress of the story and negative comments without legitimate and/or constructive criticism are never pleasant to read.**

 **But as always: I hope you enjoy reading and remember: Reviews are love!  
~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER THREE  
** _We both need to wake up  
_ – One Direction / Same Mistakes –

SEPTEMBER 5, 2009

Weak as a kitten, Elena leaned against a tree, emptied her stomach more or less silently and spat until she tasted only bile. With the back of her hand, the brunette wiped her mouth and breathed deeply in and out. After the encounter between Stefan and Caroline, she had tried to prove to herself that the accusations of her friend weren't true. She had turned into an alcoholic wreck within a very short time and paid now the price for her stubbornness.

 _»I love you too,« Stefan murmured, pressing a light kiss on her crown. Then he smiled tenderly, wiped a remaining tear from her cheek and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear to fix it in place. This time Elena didn't flinch when Stefan touched her face. Instead she replied honestly his loving smile and sighed happily. Now would everything be alright._

 _Stefan's presence soothed Elena and she was glad once more to have this man behave supportively towards her. He had a way of life that many would call dull but for Elena it was his down-to-earthness and the perceived safety which made him so attractive to her. In his presence she felt always safe and in good hands. She didn't have to worry about any surprises waiting for her because Stefan was largely predictabale and Elena loved that. It could be said that she already lived a life that many people didn't do until marriage but she enjoyed the stability and the feeling of security that her relationship promised her. It was easy to live like this and everyone who said that this was nothing contrary to passion and adventure couldn't have experienced it. Elena was completely satisfied with her situation and her relationship. She was happy._

 _»Come on, let's get some drinks and sit by the fire. And when everything is okay again, you get your present,« Stefan suggested. Elena's smile widened and she nodded approvingly._

 _After the first beer, not counting the previously ones, Elena felt a little tipsy but in a good and pleasant way. That way in which you get into a merry-go-round and enjoy the wind in your hair while the carousel is steadily and slowly driving his laps and gives you the feeling of security and fun in childhood. That way in which the problems are still very small and every mountain becomes a molehill again. That kind that makes you laugh out loud and live in the moment. She enjoyed spending time with Stefan and talking to him about everything under the sun, about everybody and his dog. Only the Caroline-topic didn't came up. However, it was like a silent agreement. Neither the dark-haired girl, nor her boyfriend mentioned the blonde—at least not in connection with the previous incidents. Both wanted to spend the evening together without seeing dark clouds floating above their relationship._

 _»Time for your surprise,« Stefan finally announced after the second beer. Elena bit her lower lip slightly nervous. She had never liked surprises and she hoped from the bottom of her heart that Stefan hadn't planned anything big. But that would not match with his personality._

 _He laughed as if he knew about her thoughts and said, »Don't worry sweetheart. I won't raid you with something out of the ordinary. It's just a little gift. But you still have to close your eyes.«_

 _Elena exhaled deeply, rolling her eyes in mocking amusement and spoke teasingly, »If you insist!« She waited a few more heartbeats and fluttered her eyelashes but Stefan just grinned._

 _»Come on, close your eyes!«_

 _Elena surrendered. She felt a light breeze as Stefan stepped behind her and shuddered briefly as he gathered her hair and put it over her right shoulder just to press a whiff of a kiss on her exposed neck before he wrapped both of his arms around her and she felt his arms rubbing over her leather jacket. Suddenly the dark-haired girl felt something chilly and small lying on her décolleté and heard a soft snapping sound as if Stefan closed a clip more forceful than necessary. A smile played around her lips as she put together the pieces of the puzzle and realized he had put a piece of jewlery around her neck. Once again Stefan gathered her hair and pulled it out from under the necklace to bring it back to its original position._

 _»You can open your eyes, sweetie.«_

 _Eagerly Elena followed the instruction and immediately looked down to inspect her gift. A silverly medaillion with a sanguine edged gem in the upper third dangled between her girls and assorted well with Elena's remaining jewelry. As if Bonnie had guessed or knew something in the selection of those things. The necklace looked old, almost antique, and had a dainty pattern but this only enhanced its charm, as Elena thought, and after admiring her present for a few moments she turned around to Stefan to thank him properly._

 _After this beautiful and special moment between Elena and Stefan, followed by the enjoyment of three more drinks, everything was suddenly to much. Hardly surprising, considering that the dark-haired girl can't hold her liquor in general and despite her constant assurances that everything was fine, she still was emotionally completely upset._

The young woman clutched to the trunk and tried for the second time that evening and in those woods to calm her breath down. As she stood tilting forwards, ready for another wave of nausea, her gaze fell on Stefan's gift around her neck and she was so ashamed that she had ruined the evening even if her boyfriend wasn't aware of that. It was enough that Elena knew.

When she felt sick for the first time, she had left Stefan sitting by the bonfire—engaged in a conversation with Tyler—and disappeared into the forest. She doubted that anyone had noticed that she didn't come back. Even though she hadn't told anyone, Elena decided that the wisest and modest thing at this moment would be to go home. But before she could call her parents she needed to become a little bit more sober. A walk to the street was the perfect for her chance to sober up. The result of the light of the bonfire and the lanterns for decoration purposes was that the greater part of the forest was lit enough that she would only need the flashlight-app on her mobile phone in some darker parts.

After a few moments, which the dark-haired girl needed before she felt more or less safe on her own legs and didn't think that she would have to re-acquaint herself with the taste of her bile after the first steps forwards, she stood upright. Nevertheless she set off with a little unsteady feet and exhausted breaths which relaxed after a short time.

 **#**

Elena had already covered about three quarters of the way when she heard atypical sounds for a night in the forest and stood stock-still. Someone whimpered and the young woman thought for a moment that these sounds where caused by pain. The silence was then filled with a loud groan and despite Elena's lack of experience she immediately abandoned her first thought and her cheeks turned crimson in the space of seconds. She stood sessile on the piece of ground and didn't know in which direction she should break withough disturbing the people who were enjoying their intimate togetherness. Finally the dark-haired girl pulled herself together, took slowly one step at time and tried to move away from the noises. Her sense of direction—no, all her senses—were sorely afflicted through the alcohol consumption and she didn't notice that she wasn't bringing distance between herself and the people but was heading straight for them. The forest was already clearer here and so she didn't need the flashlight on her mobile phone to move along. Luckily because that would have drawn to much attention to her.

Elena moved as quiet as possible forward, intent on making as few sounds as possible to not betray her presence. As she walked around a tree she found herself standing on a small clearance and without wanting, her gaze fell on the couple about fifteen meters from her. The young man pressed the girl in an intimate embrance against a tree trunk. She had her head buried in the crook of his neck and her skirt was pushed up to the hip. One leg—stabilized by his hand—was wrapped around his waist and her whole body was flush against his as if she couldn't get enough of the physical contact and his body. Elena couldn't see more than the slow thrusts of his lower body. Her face felt hot. She was probably still crimson and her hands began to sweat. One of both let out a deep moan intervowen with lust, causing a strange but pleasant feeling in Elena's stomach. As much as she was ashamed to watch this scene, she couldn't take her eyes off it. Until the young man—without interrupting his unerring and graceful movements, which led the girl to a soft but enjoyable whimper—turned his head in Elena's direction. Everything became clear. Elena counted one and one together as she gazed into piercing blue eyes, which seemed most likely because of the distance—or was it the sexual attraction—so much darker and lustfully draped. A dirty smile played around his lips, his face was slightly reddened and he winked at her suggestively before the tip of his tongue moistened his lips. That erotic sight turned Elena's legs near instant to jelly. At that moment, the young woman uttered a hoarse, shaky but loud, »Oh God, Damon!« And while Elena turned round on her heel, staggered briefly and ran at the opposite direction as fast as her legs could carry her, it dawned on her that Damon's partner was her cousin Katherine and somehow he had cast a spell over her again. Elena couldn't even blame her—his stature and the expression on his face etched in her mind. How could a man like him be so disgustingly beautiful at any moment?

 **#**

Finally she reached the edge of the woods and stood on the street. Her breath came in short, painful intervals and she pressed her hands into her sides to minimize the sting even tough the gesture had no effect. Her toughts were buzzing in her head and she didn't know which one to admit first. The entire evening was too disturbing and Elena wondered frantically what she had done wrong in her life to have to experience Damon and Katherine twice in a short space of time and in the middle of their private scenes. She could still get along with the observed dispute although he had ended in this verbal mud fight between her and the older one of the Salvatore brothers and she had to listen to allegations concerning Stefan's infidelity. But the make-up sex in its erotic completeness ruffled her inmost beeing and she couldn't explain the strange feelings she felt. It almost felt like she was attraced to the scene. Both, physically and emotionally. Something awoke inside of her and Elena didn't want to believe that Damon was the reason. She didn't want to think about it any more because it felt like she was unfaithful to Stefan in a mental way. Still, she couldn't deny that the sight of the united bodies was something sensual ans she wished she could be the one to be conquered and fulfilled by someone. But that would never affect her decision to wait. Because she made that choice a long time ago and the brunette was determinated to wait for the right moment and continue to take it slow despite her yearlong relationship with Stefan.

After she had recovered and the pain in her side disappeared, she rummaged trough her purse looking for her mobile phone. Elena dialed her parent's number although she hesitated to call.

»Mum,« she said as Miranda took the call, »I'm standing on the road behind the forest. Right at the intersection and I wanted to ask if you or Dad could possible pick me up?«

» _Something happened? You sound curned?_ « Miranda asked worried.

For a moment Elena thought how to answer those two questions. She didn't want to lie to her mother but she couldn't tell her the truth either.

»I, uh, no, just the usual, mum. Caroline,« she replied cryptically. The dark-haired girl heard her mother's sigh and could see the facial expression she was about to wear right in her mind's eye. Miranda wasn't happy that Care had so much influence on her daughter's relationship and views. Elena always tried to keep this influence low but Caroline's personality and temperament made this endeavor difficult.

» _Stay at the intersection but don't go on the street. Your dad will start right away and pick you up._ «

»Thank you mum.«

After Elena had finished the call, she noticed that she had received a message from Caroline in the meantime, saying:

And where are you again buzzkill?  
You're missing the whole party!

Eye-rolling Elena pressed the small button to delete the message and switched off her mobile phone. She had absolutely no desire to deal with the blonde again. But the dark-haired girl also knew that she wouldn't be able to deflect this conversation for long. It was important to her to be able to enjoy at least a little lull before the storm. Apart from the fact that a hurricane raged in her head anyway.

 **An hour later …**

Hidden under her blanket, Elena tried not to cry. The magnitude of her experiences hit her with full force. Damon had hinted that Stefan was not honest with her and as much she was trying to stamp that idea as an idiotic manipulation game, the nagging doubt in her heart didn't want to go away. She had not the slightest reason to distrust Stefan but in order to invalidate Damon's words and live her life without problems, she had to be sure. Elena's fingers absentmindedly played with the medaillion and suddenly the piece of jewlery snapped open. She pulled the covers off her head and turned her bedside lamp on. Then she opened the clip of the necklace and a soft smile played around her lips as she saw the photo of Stefan and herself inside the silvery gift. A warm feeling flowed through her and a deep sigh escaped her lips. With the thought of having to talk to Katherine she finally fell asleep.


	5. 4: Things we don't talk about

**AN: Dear readers!  
** **I'm sorry that it took me so long to update but I hope you're still on board with this story. In the following chapter you will be acquainted with more of the characters from the series, yay. More importantly I made some adaptions regarding the age of some characters. Those will be edited into the summary in the prologue. The detailed consideration regarding the characters field of studies made that necessary and the former ages were not reasonable anymore.  
** **However, I hope you enjoy reading and remember–as always: reviews are love!  
** **~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
** **All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
** **Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore.**

* * *

 **CHAPTER FOUR  
** Things we don't talk about  
– The Fray / Never Say Never –

SEPTEMBER 6, 2009

The last free day before the new school year has begun. Elena was woken by a loud knock on her door and only seconds later it was opened and Jenna slipped through the gap.

»I wish you a beautiful good morning my favourite niece,« she said in a happy, lively tone and quickly crossed the room to sit on the edge of Elena's bed. A smile appeared on her lips as she looked down at the dark-haired girl. Elena's hair looked like a dark bird's nest, lying draped like Medusa's snakes on the headrest pad, half-hidden under the fluffy blanket and some remaining traces of yesterday's make-up were blackish under her eyes.

»Newsflash Aunt Jenna–I'm your only niece,« Elena grumbled sleepily, moved a little bit up and slowly rubbed her eyes. As a result, the fraction of mascara that was left over from the neglected make-up removal at night was smeared even further, leaving her with the look of a cuddly bear. Elena slid further up, finally arriving in a half-sitting position and her gaze fixed on her aunt, who laughed silently.

»Yet you are my favourite niece. Although you are more like a panda at the moment than your usual self.« Jenna chuckled amused and continued, »Obviously the party yesterday lasted a bit longer, huh?« The older woman raised an eyebrow and grinned cheerfully before she spoke again: »Your mother already told me that Grayson had to pick you up in the middle of the night.«

Elena brought her hands over her eyes and sighed deeply and partly ashamed, because she was so upset and still a little drunk when her father had picked her up at the intersection yesterday. But partly also because at this moment some memories of the previous evening were coming back to the surface and and the young woman was not ready to measure up to dealing with those and to face the questions she posed.

»Please Aunt Jenna–let's not talk about it yet. It's too early,« Elena complained, peering through between her fingers.

Another laugh followed and Jenna said: »Dear, it's already eleven o'clock in the morning and you have successfully slept through breakfast-time. The excuse ›too early‹ is really no longer valid.«

Elena dropped her hands back into her lap and her eyes widened. The sight made Jenna laughing out loud again, while the dark-haired girl turned her head and squinted at the alarm clock on her bedside table.

»Oh no,« Elena exclaimed. »Why wasn't I woken by anybody?«

Jenna shrugged slightly and finally got up again.

»We thought you could use the sleep. But don't worry–the coffee is still hot and in the kitchen.« With an appraising look at her niece's appearance she added: »But you should definitely take a shower first.«

»Hmph,« was the only sound that came from the dark-haired girl and she pulled the covers over her head in ambarrassment.

»Don't take too long,« Jenna warbled and crossed the room before she left, closing the door quietly behind her. Elena let a breath escape she didn't know she held and ventured another look at the analog clock. It actually was already 11:07 AM and she wondered why her alarm clock didn't ring. Usually, she always got up early on sundays to have breakfast with her family. Especially since her aunt Jenna had moved back to her parent's house at the beginning of the summer break and now lived with them. The breakfast had become quickly a pleasant tradition. Actually, Jenna didn't want to stay that long. But her old apartment near the campus was renovated and redeveloped and all those fun lasted longer as the craftsmen discovered that all the cables and lines had to be replaced as well. The owner and landlord of the apartment didn't like the additionals costs and the effort, so he stopped the work a few weeks ago and Jenna moved officially and for an indefinite period of time into the house of her sister Miranda.

Elena crawled out from under the covers and fished for her bag, which layed on the floor, to pull out her mobile phone and sighed. Now she knew why no alarm clock was ringing and she vaguely remembered switching her phone off after receiving a message from Caroline. In a seated position on the bed, she finally pushed the power button and after a few moments looking at the home screen, she entered her pincode. Suddenly she was bombarded by what felt like thousands of messages and she raised an eyebrow and felt utterly confused. _What's going on now?_

Caroline, 01:32  
Elena? Where are you?

01:33  
Missed call from Caroline

01:34  
Missed call from Bonnie

01:35  
Missed call from Stefan

Stefan, 1:37  
Darling, where did you go? We are worried!

01:40  
Missed call from Caroline

01:41  
Missed call from Bonnie

Bonnie, 1:45  
Elena? Are you alright? Everything OK? Where are you?

Caroline, 1:45  
Why is your phone off? God, Elena, where are you?

01:45  
Missed call from Stefan

01:46  
Missed call from Tyler

Stefan, 1:50  
Elena? Please contact me as soon as you read this! Vicki has disappeared and we cannot find her … and you. We are all so worried, darling! Jules saw you walking into the forest–please say you're alright! Please answer me!

01:59  
Missed call from Stefan

02:05  
Missed call from Stefan

02:07  
Missed call from Bonnie

02:10  
Missed call from _unknown number_

02:11  
Missed call from Stefan

Stefan, 02:12  
I just hope you are finde and you're at home. I love you!

 _unknown number_ , 05:32  
Gilbert. Call Stefan. Immediately.

The total confusion was not an adequate expression of the feelings which brewed in Elena. Apparently her friends–and an unknown person–had noticed that she had sneaked off. At that moment another new message came in.

Stefan, 11:10  
Elena? Vicki was found … please, please say you're okay!

The dark-haired girl caught her breath and without another thought about it, she dialed her boyfriend's number.

»Stefan?« Her voice was soft, almost faint, as Stefan picked up immediately after the first ring.

» _God, Elena!_ « She heard only a deep sight and a heavy exhale on the other end of the phone. The Stefan spoke slowly: » _I … oh god … I was so worried, baby. Are you alright?_ «

»Yes,« Elena replied. »I–I'm so sorry. I didn't feel well yesterday. I ran off and called my parents. I … I'm alright, just a bit tired. I'm so sorry Stefan. I didn't want anyone to worry. You all had fun and seemed so distraced. Nobody paid attention to me and I was sick.« She tried to explain why she left but it sounded like a lame excuse. But Stefan was always understanding and his soothing and loving tone kept Elena from crying.

» _I'm so glad you're alright, Lena,_ « he replied briskly, adding, » _Would it be okay if I came by in the afternoon and we talk?_ « The end of the sentence almost seemed desperate, hoping that she wouldn't refuse.

»Of course! I want to see you–,» Elena said hastily, »–and thanks, thanks for the medaillon. I discovered the photo tonight.« She smiled a tiny smile and though Stefan couldn't see it, he knew it was there.

» _Everything for you, beautiful._ «

»Hm. I love you, Stefan!«

» _I love you too, Elena. See you later!_ «

»Stefan, wait,« Elena exclaimed to stop him from hanging up on her.

» _What is it, baby?_ «

»What happened to Vicki?«

At the other end of the phone only a deep sigh was heard.

»Tell me,« Elena said quietly and closed her eyes, not prepared for what was coming, but knewing instinctively that it was a bad thing.

» _Matt called me earlier. She disappeared yesterday. About the same time as you._ « Stefan paused, breathing deeply as if preparing emotionally for his coming words.

» _She was brutally beaten up and … someone sexually abused her. She is alive–calm down, Lena!_ « He tried to reassure Elena as she narrowed her eyes and began to breathe heavily. She wrapped her free arm around and tried to hug herself. A shaky ›Oh God‹ burst oud of her.

» _She lives! She lost a lot of blood, but she lives!_ «

»Oh God, oh God, oh God.« Like a mantra, Elena repeated these words to keep herself from breaking down. Stefan's voice was thin and quiet too as he said: » _I'm just glad it wasn't you._ «


	6. 5: I didn't see it coming

**AN: Dear readers!  
** **I'm back with a new chapter and it was faster than expected. You may look forward to a confrontation between Stefan and Elena but their relationship will not be completely over yet. I would really appreciate if you all could cut out how awful you find it that Elena & Stefan as well as Damon & Katherine are together in your private messages. I've deliberately decided that this story tells a slow burning lovestory between Damon and Elena and it's not done with a snap. Everyone starts at a certain point and my beginning includes the views and feelings of Damon and Elena at a time when they are still in different relationships. I understand everyone who don't like Stelena or their affectionate behaviour in the last chapters—I assure you I don't like them either as a pair but I think they have great chemistry as friends—but all those who have nothing more to say than getting strong feelings about the current couple constellations or demonizing Stelena & Datherine please don't write any more private messages to me; put it in a review where anyone can see your opinion. Thank you very much. Constructive criticism is—of course—still very welcome and to everyone else: thank you for reviewing, following and putting me and my story on the list of your favourites. You are awesome!**

 **If you haven't read something of the fantastic writing of Carol and Eva, check out their narratives published on scarlett2112. They currently are writing a beautiful story called ›Welcome to the Jungle‹ with a lot of mysteries and Damon as a cop who is investigating the murder of Elena's halfbrother Jeremy. I'm totally in love with it. I can also recommend Taarokos story(s) ›Off by a Single Degree‹ Part I and Part II. I am currently translating her work to the german language and it is a wonderful slow burning story of Delena and what would have happend if Elena's phone died at the night of the bonfire. Foreverfirstloves wrote the exceptional and now finished story ›East of Valhalla‹ and is currently working on a Delena-fic with an greek god setting called ›All is fair‹ in which Elena is the daugher of Aphrodite and Ares and Damon the son of Hades and Persephone. And last but not least: Bonnie (Salvatoreboys4ever) is writing ›Captive Of Her Beauty‹, an enormous fic following Damon and Elena into very dangerous fields.**  
 **I have to say Bonnie, Eva, Carol, Foreverfirstloves and Taaroko are a few of the authors here who've awaken my love to write again and I'm so grateful for this. So check out their storys if you don't know them yet.**

 **And (really) last but not least—and sorry for the long AN: I hope you enjoy reading and remember: reviews are love!**

 **~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
** **All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
** **Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER FIVE  
** I didn't see it coming  
– Tiësto / Feel It In My Bones –

SEPTEMBER 6, 2009

It was difficult to understand and to assimilate this information about Vicki's condition. While Elena took a shower her knees were trembling wildly and silent tears mingled with water and the remaining make-up. She couldn't imagine what could have happened if this offender had crossed her path instead of Vicki's. Alone in the woods, stumbling half-drunk over tree stumps, unsettled and confused. She would have been such an easy prey. A soft sob escaped the dark-haired girl and she leaned her forehead against the tiled wall to control her breathing. _In and out. In and out. In and out. What's wrong with this world?_

Elena felt better after a big cup of hot coffee but she didn't felt the need to spend the day with her family. She clearly had to sort out her mind and emotionally prepare herself for the conversation with Stefan and possible other news about Vicki. So she spent the afternoon in her room, writing down all her thoughts.

September 6, 2009  
Dear Diary!  
I would have never considered the possibility that I am in a need to reconsider or even to revoke yesterday's words. An encounter at the bonfire opened my eyes, or at least made me think about a few things. It's obvious that I don't know everything about Stefan and his past. His older brother Damon mentioned something during a heated conversation which caused a little bit of doubt in me. Of course it's possible that this was just his usual behavior and he intended to drive a wedge between us because Stefan and I are so much **more** than him and Katherine. But I can't shake the feeling that his words contained a grain of truth and Stefan wasn't honest or at least not completely honest with me.  
Damon said that something happened between Stefan and my cousin. He also told me that Stefan would never be completely happy with me. I can't imagine Katherine would do that to me. But to be honest, we have never had a good relationship. I don't know what's going on in her head or on which thoughts she is dwelling. All I know is that she has to be unhappy.  
I witnessed a fight between her and Damon and it confirmed once again that Stefan's brother isn't a good person. Therefore, I am really unsure if I should believe his words and allegations. But what if I ignore it and it turns out to be true and Damon was right? If I have to trust one thing, it's that Damon doesn't tell lies. At least that was his statement … but can I trust him? Why should he give me such an information? Maybe he really just wants others suffering like himself. His relationship with Katherine ist not necessarily healthy. They have rather a tempestuouse and unharmonious relationship than an affectionate or wonderful one. At least that's what it looks like from an outsiders point of view.  
Yesterday wasn't the first time I saw them fighting … they are not really trying to hide their difficulties. Everyone knows the stories … but still, they seem to find to each other again and again. If this erotic scene in the forest, I accidentally came across—

Just the thought of the make-up sex between her cousin and Damon made Elena blush heavily and her cheeks felt hot. Her hand, holding the fountain pen, trembled slightly and she had to put it aside to not stain the pages of her diary with ink. Elena buried her face in her hands and was helpless against her mind which rewound to this special moment. She was—again—confronted with the sight of Damon's azure blue eyes. The dark-haired girl sat abruptely up and shook her head with the plan to dispel this memory. Why was she so stirred up by this memory? Passionate scenes like those in the woods can be seen in every second television program. Yet, a small voice in her head whispered that hardly anyone in the telly looked like Damon. At this moment, her mother called from the ground-floor: »Elena? Stefan is here!« Ashamed and hurried, she shut her journal and brushed the dark hair from her forehead before hiding her most secret thoughts and feelings under a stack of textbooks and putting the cap on the fountain pen.

 **Twenty minutes later …**

The atmosphere between Elena and Stefan was tense. The couple lay side by side on Elena's bed, staring at the ceiling when the brunette finally spoke.

»Did Matt call you again?« She asked quietly, turning her head so she could look at Stefan. Her eyes showed sympathy and compassion—for Matt and for Vicki—but also shame for her behaviour and for just running away without telling anyone. Stefan sighed but didn't turn to her and continued to look up at the ceiling.

»She's still unconscious and in the hospital. But Matt told me she will recover. Even if it will take a long time and it will leave scars. He said that she had a pretty bad cut on her neck and one on the cheek. The sheriff suspects—according to Matt—that the attacker also hit her with a broken beer bottle. But we didn't have any bottles at the party … so none of us could be a suspect,« he finally answered hesitantly. The he suddenly sat up and focused on Elena with a hard look.

»Did you actually think yesterday? Don't get me wrong honey, but your behavior was so irresponsible. It could have happened to you!« His voice was louder than intended, because his face showed an expression of regret right after his outburst. Elena closed her eyes and pressed her lips tightly together. The emotions raged inside her and she didn't know how to answer. Her explanation during the phonecall earlier was so vague and she owed Stefan the truth.

»I … I'm so sorry Stefan. I ruined the whole evening. I know that it was totally stupid to just run away and leave the party in the middle of nowhere but I didn't feel well. Damon—«

»What does my brother have to do with it?« Stefan asked surprised and Elena opened her eyes, looked at him and sighed.

»Anything and everything,« she replied cryptically, gathering her courage to tell Stefan the whole story.

»Before you came to the party yesterday, I accidentely ran into a fight between your brother and my cousin and it was really, really bad. They shouted at each other. Kat accused him of seeing other girls and he didn't even denied it. After that, Damon noticed my presence, confronted me about it … and said some very ugly things.«

A disbelieving look appeared on Stefan's face but he didn't interrupt Elena and so she continued in a low voice: »About you. And about me. And about us. He wanted to drag you into this story and talked about you not knowing how lucky you were to have Katherine and now you just console yourself with me—«, at this point her voice breaks and her eyes darted to Stefan's eyes but she couldn't read anything in them. He showed no response to her words, at least none that would have soothed Elena. A muscle in his jaw jerked and now he avoided Elena's gaze. The dark-haired girl turned to her side and finally sat up to be on the same level as Stefan. She dared not to ask, she even didn't dare to think about it but Stefan didn't spoke. He denied nothing and Elena's eyes started to burn. Distracted she reached for her anniversary gift—the beautiful, antique medallion.

»Is it true?« She felt so uncertain, so small and so worthless when Stefan finally looked at her. There were no feelings in his eyes; there were nothing in it: just a deep, green expanse from which she could read absolutely nothing. Then he slouched his shoulders and a deep breath escaped him. His voice was almost emotionless when he asked: »What exactly did Damon say?«

»Is it true?« Elena repeated her question now with panic in her voice. Powerless, she let her hands fall into her lap as her necklace dangled between her breasts and she kept feeling the cool material on her skin.

»Is it true that you slept with my cousin? Is it true?« Tears were gathering in her eyes and Elena blinked hard to drive them away. She didn't want to appear weak, though her tone betrayed her. Stefan avoided her gaze once again and swallowed.

»I …«

 _Oh God, it's really true. It's really true. Damon was right! He was right!_ Elena bit her lower lip hard and closed her eyes. Tears now ran down her pretty face but she made no sound. She couldn't look at Stefan anymore. She couldn't believe it. She would have never thought, would have never guessed … Stefan is an honest guy. She would have thought everybody is capable of hiding something from her, but not **her** Stefan. Not the boy she loved. Not Stefan, with whom she had imagined her life. No, not only she wanted this life. They had talked about it, had made plans together for their future **together**. And now that: Katherine. Her cousin. Her stomach felt awkward, hot and as it would begin to bubble. She felt sick. And there was this lump in her chest, an adamant lump. She couldn't classify those feelings at first but the brainwave came. It was anger, coupled with disappointment and shame. Shame related to herself for beeing so blind, so gullible. She had always imagined Stefan as the good knight, the white prince. As a man no one could harm. An honest, sensitive and confident young man whom she wanted by her side and vice versa. And all that had been a lie. A cautious sob escaped her—she couldn't fight the tide of emotions any longer.

»It's true, right? He didn't lie to me. Damon did not lie …«

»It's not what you think Lena!« Stefan finally answered. »I … you … it was before we even started dating. The summer before.«

Elena didn't want to hear Stefan out. She didn't want to hear about her cousin and her boyfriend. Frantically she shook her head, tears still streaming down her cheeks. _To hell with you Damon!_ She would rather have never even heard of them together but it was like there was suddenly the plug pulled out and Stefan began talking, explaining and finding excuses. Only a few phrases found their way into Elenas brain while her eyes glazed with tears and her focus hung on the man she had given her heart to. She didn't understand. She didn't want to feel and she asked herself over and over againt what she had done to deserve this kind of pain and why Damon was such an sadistic asshole to give her a lead to the death of her relationship.

»We have never been together and Kat and Damon had broken up very recently. She was sad and distressed and I merely wanted to comfort her. I wanted to talk to her and tell her that she deserves so much more. And then it just happened. She kissed me, but Lena, I didn't kiss her back. I didn't react on it. I didn't want it. Even then I solely wanted you but I couldn't fight her off. She kissed me again and again and then Damon came. He saw it … he saw us and he laughed and just turned away. He left … and then Kat started to cry and I just couldn't leave her there. So I took care of her. She had a few drinks and I brought her home. That's all. I swear Elena! Nothing happened. Believe me, please! I was already in love with you back then. I never said anything because she's your cousin. I didn't want to worsen your relationship. I knew you didn't like each other very much and you weren't on good terms. And it wasn't really relevant to me. Nothing happend. I just brought her home … I … I'm sorry Lena. Please forgive me. Please!«

The dark-haired girl snorted. »Please go!« She never had thought she would hear so much anger in her own voice, but Stefan still looked at her with an expression of despair mixed with plea. She almost gave it but she also couldn't stand his sight anymore. She was too hurt to think at the moment and her mind played out a few imaginary scenes between Stefan and Katherine. She involuntarily projected Stefan's looks into the scene between Damon and her cousin she witnessed yesterday. Her heart raced faster and contracted then out of pain. Even though it hadn't been Stefan, the mere thought of something intimate between the two felt as if something stabbed her deep in the chest and punched a hole trough her stomach.

»I can't look at you right now Stefan,« she said with a constrained voice. »Please go, I–«

»Lena, nothing happened«, the young Salvatore asserted again, reaching for her shoulders to force her gaze in his direction. If there were no emotions before, there was a flood of them now: shame, regret and fear. Fear to lose Elena. Reluctantly, Elena made eyecontact with Stefan—a few seconds—before she shook of his hands and put hers on his. Pleading and sad, she looked at him, squeezed her united hands briefly and said then: »Please go. I need time. Time to digest all of this.«

 **Several hours later …**

She didn't see it coming. Well, that wasn't the truth. She didn't want to see this coming. Minutes after Stefan left the Gilbert's house, Elena still sat there as before. Her hands clasped in her lap, looking into the void. And then the time flew. She had tried to remember what Stefan had said to her but could not reconstruct much of it. The summer in which they kissed the first time was also the summer in which he kissed her cousin—before her. Even after a few hours, the brunette didn't know how to handle this situation. Stefan had left her a message but she didn't want to read it yet. The question Elena asked herself now was if she wanted to nix all her dreams and plans with Stefan because of one kiss that took place before their relationship even started or if she could react like an adult; if she could overlook that; if she could forgive Stefan for kissing her cousin—her own flesh and blood. But she couldn't even imagine what to choose.


	7. 6: Just another stone on broken walls

**AN: Dear readers!  
** **Mark the 25th of every month in your calender because this will be my future update-day! The next chapters are written and are waiting for translation. Have fun with a piece of Damon's mind and remember: reviews are love! Also I would like to announce that I am currently writing a Delena one-shot. It will be posted in the next few days.  
** **~ Ria**

 **Disclaimer:  
** **All characters belong to their rightful owner. I'm just messing around with their lives.  
** **Though I'd like to own some mysterious dark-haired guy named Damon Salvatore!**

* * *

 **CHAPTER SIX  
** _Just another stone on broken walls_  
– Gallant / Bourbon –

SEPTEMBER 6, 2009

The stone cubes in his bourbon glass jingled softly as he led the glass to his lips to sip the liquid. Preoccupied in thoughts, his gaze wandered around the room, pausing at the roaring flames in the fireplace before his attention was drawn to a dark corner and the piano standing there. How long had it been since he played on it? Fourteen month? Or sixteen month? Damon couldn't remember. It must have been before the last so-called break between him and Katherine. Because after they had reconciled, nothing was the same as before. He wondered how much dust had gathered on the furniture. Because currently it was no more than a piece of furniture. An object to decorate the room but not an object to use. No more. Maybe never again.

The three stones jingled again as Damon realized that there was only a small slug left of his bourbon. He rose from the heavy armchair with a groan and went to the serving cabinet. He intended to partake only a finger-width of the brown-golden liquid. But when he removed the stopper of the crystalline decanter and started pouring the alcohol into his glass, it was more. The slight burning, which the bourbon left in his throat, was reassuring. Something he could rely on. Nowadays he couldn't rely on much. At least not on Katherine. Not on the woman who had his heart in her claws. From day to day it felt more like he was trapped in a snare and there was no way out of this situation. He had fallen under her spell; was devoted with his body and soul. As if he had signed a binding contract with his blood … with the queen of hell. He couldn't leave her. And no matter how often and how many times she had pulled the ripping cord, they had found each other again and again. At least on a physical level

Damon wondered when it had begun to go so rapidly to the south but couldn't pinpoint the moment. Like his last memory on playing the piano, that one was blurry. But how many people were able to designate a certain moment as the beginning of the end? One out of ten? One out of a hundred or even just one out of thousands? The man with the blackish hair sighed, stepped back to his armchair and sat down, slowly swinging the crystalline class in his right hand back and forth. Katherine. Katherine's eyes were the color of golden bourbon. Maybe a shade darker. But who knows. How long had it been since he saw her in full daylight? Since he looked in her eyes? In eyes that didn't despise him?

Brown eyes. Elena also had brown eyes. But dark ones. Warm ones of the color of dark chocolate. Another brown which despised him. Why was he thinking of Elena now? Maybe because her contempt was justified? Nearly, just nearly, he regretted his words which he spoke yesterday. Still, it was the truth. And Damon always spoke the truth. Maybe he had even felt a little sorry for his brother's girl. She didn't know to what she had herself embarked with, which encumbrances and what lies Stefan brought with him. He was always the good, golden boy but inside he had always craved more attention. Even more than the attention he already had from everyone.

The loud bang of the front door startled Damon and he lost the focus of his thoughts.

»Damon?« The tone of his name sounded through the lobby. His brother's voice didn't sound friendly, more angered. Another person who had merely contempt for him? Stefan should join the end of the queue, Damon thought to himself, and made no move to answer his younger brother. He would find him anyway in a few moments. And there he saw the silhouette of the younger Salvatore appearing in the doorway. But the presence of Stefan wasn't enough for Damon to raise his glance. He continued to focus on the well-filled glass in his hand and raised it to his lips again.

»Damon,« Stefan said and now there was real annoyance in his voice. Paired with reproach … or disapproval? »It's not even six o'clock.« The dark-haired man shrugged. He actually didn't care.

»Did I ask for the time, little brother?« He replied listlessly. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Stefan approaching and after a few moments he finally bothered to look at him. A smug grin graced his lips and Stefan's jawbones showed clearly as he pressed his lips together in disapproval.

»Damon, why?«

The person in question frowned. »Damon, why what?« He answered with several questions: »Damon why is there so much bourbon in your glass or Damon since when do you own stone chillers or Damon why are you at home and not in your own flat or Damon why are you sitting here in the dimness or another Damon why? I certainly can answer the first questions, little brother. If there's another ›Damon, why‹ then you have to clearly specify your choice of words. I'm talented in many things. Unfortunatly, reading your thoughts isn't one of them. To be honest, even without this ability, I'm exceptionally good in between the sheets.«

Watching Stefan, as his face was now sprinkled with a slight shade of red, he chuckled in amusement and took another sip of his bourbon. It would clearly—and from experience—take a few moments for his brother to find his voice again. Inwardly, Damon counted from ten down and as if right on cue, Stefan cleared his throat when Damon reached the zero.

»Damon, why did you talk to Elena?« The voice of the younger Salvatore quivered slighly but Damon could read him like an open book. Stefan tried to act calmly and confidentely but internally he was nervous and insecure. Above all, his eyes spoke volumes. He was afraid. He didn't fear Damon per se, but he was afraid of his answer.

»Which Elena do you mean?« Once again Damon frowned, tapping his chin with his left index finger in slow intervals as if he were thinking hard. Did he enjoy winding up his brother? Yes, definitely. It was simply terrific how he stood in front of him, almost desperately waiting for an answer. »Elena, Elena, Elena … I don't think I know any Elena, Stefan.«

»Stop this shit, Damon,« huffed Stefan angry. Damon straightened up in the armchair and focused on his brother, an amused glint in his eyes.

»Well, well, well—« he rebuked his brother with a wagging finger, »—this wasn't an appropriate phrase, little brother.«

»Damon, please. What did you say to her?« Stefan tried obviously a different approach since anger didn't help him. Now he had a pleading tone in his voice and his body was literally slumping down. Stefan slouched his shoulders, his head dropped by a few inches and he breathed out softly and deeply at once. Damon felt almost sorry for him. But only almost because the dark-haired man knew his brother and he knew that his submissive behavior was only pretended.

»I can't resist this request,« Damon sighed theatrically. He placed his glass of bourbon on the small sidetable but not without taking another sip first and closing his eyes with pleasure when doing so.

»Well, what did I say to your Elena? Let me just think for a moment.« Damon could play this game forever. In front of him, Stefan stepped from one leg to the other, shifting his weight constantly from one side to the other and he seemed more nervous by every passing second. Well, this was not insincere. This nervousness was real and the expression in Stefan's green eyes told Damon everything he needed to know. And a little bit more.

»Judging by your appearance you already know what I said to her,« Damon finally said, looking his brother straight in the eyes. »I told her the truth. The truth you have kept from her for over a year.«

Stefan snorted in frustration and clenched his hands into fists. »You had no right to do that, Damon!«

»You bet! I had the right,« Damon hissed, leaning forward before he got on his feet. Slowly, he really lost his patience with his brother. Although there were about the same size, Damon could look down to Stefan because he still hadn't straighten up. Stefan's clenched fists trembled but Damon didn't care. His little brother didn't have the balls to mess with him. He never had.

»But when we are already philosophizing about right and wrong … did you have the right to bill and coo with Katherine and hide it from your oh-so-beloved girlfriend? Did you have the right to come between me and my girlfriend and make goo-goo eyes at her for weeks? Did you have the right to dump Kat after Elena suddenly showed interest in you? So don't give me this shit about your fucking morals when your're the one who lies to his girlfriend and pretend like everything is puppies and kittens while you fuck my girlfriend behind Elena's and my back.«

Damon took a deep breath. He wasn't finished yet and the alcohol had loosened his already loose tongue even further. »You don't deserve Katherine nor Elena, Stefan. You can't treat women like that. But how shoud you know to treat women,« Damon bit with a smug grin.

»What do you know about how to treat women? You're the one who can't or won't commit. Don't believe for a second that I haven't heard the rumors. Katherine left you not only once,« Stefan sneered and Damon's eyes flashed with amazement. He hadn't expected that his brother will fight back. The dark-haired man was also interested in the fact that Stefan didn't even deny that he have slept with Katherine. A hot ball formed itself in his stomach and solely through deep inhaling and exhaling he could bring is sudden anger under control. Damon was tempted to finish this conversation but he wasn't the type of man to let a discussion rest without having the las word. So, for the time being, he contented himself with a questioninly raised eyebrow and gestured for his brother to continue with a smirk while his stomach contracted painfully and he nourished the resentment inwardly.

»Don't let me stop you,« he added to his gesture with an amused tone and Stefan immediately puffed up.

»I didn't pinch Katherine from you. You know it as well as I do. She left—«

»And yet you were the one who wagged his tail like a puppy at the first sign of availability,« Damon interrupted him sharply. No, he couldn't listen one second longer to his brother's beating around the bush. »Did you also serve Elena the pretty story of how you just wanted to comfort Katherine? And the evil, evil Katherine was the one who threw herself on you?« Damon laughed wickedly and looked Stefan into his eyes. »And did she believe you? Did you tell your innocent little girlfriend that she can trust you? That everything you experienced with Katherine wasn't important? Because if you believe that, little brother, you are lying t yourself.«

Again, Stefan's shoulders slouched and as if someone let the air out of him, he suddenly seemed so much smaller than before. »Did she forgive you? Embrace you and telling you that she still loves you? If so, you know that that peace won't last merely until she has the guts to talk to Katherine. And if I have to bet, I would say it won't be that long. Because Elena possesses courage. You've got to hand it to her.« A corner of Damon's mouth curled itself up. »Or did she send you packing already?« With those words, the dark-haired man finished his outburst, picked up his crystalline bourbon glass and downed the rest of the liquid at one before slamming the glass back on the sidetable—of course with controlled force.

»Any questions, little brother?« He shot a warning glance towards Stefan, who stood in the middle of the room like a pile of misery and no longer had any cocky answer. »No? Good.« After all, it was Damon who had the last word. At least this time. He turned on his heel and towards the stairs. »If you'll excuse me then.«

Damon could barely keep himself from pounding his fist into the wooden paneling when he was on his way to the first floor. It wasn't that he didn't love his brother. However, Stefan's talent—to survive every hairy and risky situation unscathed and as a hero—was unbearable. Damon hadn't need an answer to his last question to know that Elena hadn't lovingly taken him in her arms again. The expression in Stefan's eyes and his posture had spoken volumes. His anger was far from subsiding but he couldn't resist a chuckle. Perhaps this would finally teach his brother that certain acts had consequences. Thereby, Damon didn't even think of himself and the contempt he had for his brother. He had nearly supressed the thought of Stefan sleeping with Katherine. At least he told himself those lies. No, he merely thought of Elena and her oh-so pure and innocent relationship with Stefan which he liked to refer to as a fairytale world. Only that this fairytale wouldn't have a happy ending. If he took the measure of Elena correctly, she wouldn't be able to overlook Stefan's secret.

Damon opened the door to his room and for a moment he just stood in the doorway to take a deep breath. Where were his thoughts before Stefan had interrupted them? Oh yes. He had admitted to pity Elena. She deserved to know the truth. He didn't know much about the Gilbert-girl but she had a good heart, even though Katherine always talked pejorative about her cousin. An invisible fist enclosed around his heart and a deep sigh escaped him. Finally, Damon crossed the threshold, closed the door behind him and locked it. He would really be able to live without another visit from Stefan or any other intrusion into his privacy. Although, Giuseppe and Lily Salvatore were at some charity event in Richmond and his sister was back at the university campus, he could never be too careful.

As he crossed the room, he slowly unbuttoned his black shirt. Button by button, until he could strip it off and he threw it carelessly on a nearby chair. The deep-seated jeans followed and only clad with his boxers, he dropped onto the bed. Katherine. Elena. Damon hadn't seen such deep and so many emotions in a while now like he saw them last night in Elena's dark eyes just those few minutes. He closed his eyes and tried to remember her face. At first, he only imagined Katherine. The distant mask of the woman, whom he loved dearly but whose cold heart he couldn't warm. Slowly, the facial features of the older Gilbert vanished and Elena's soft features took their place. Involuntarily, a gentle smile formed itself on his lips. During the first few moments of their meeting, he had seen the compassion in her eyes. But instead of reacting like a decent man—as Stefan would have done—he had caused fear in her. And yet, the fear of him was so much more refreshing than Katherine's lack of emotion. And then … how Elena had defended Stefan.

It was almost an utopian dream for Damon to imagine that someone would do that for him. He always denied that all the rumors would affect him deeply but truth to be spoken, the bad opinions of others destroyed him piece by piece. If only he knew who hated him so much to make his life worse by those untruths. It rarely passed a week in which he didn't hear another ugliness about himself. But even if a little of them contained a grain of truth, Damon saw no point in denying anything. Who would believe him? Now, years after the rumors have begun to wander through Mystic Falls. And even if he tried to rebuild his reputation, it would be exceedingly difficult for Damon to act like the model and well-behaved son, the upright and good student or the loving and loyal boyfriend. That wouldn't be his true self.

He sighed and his gaze followed the cooling fan on the ceiling, which was slowly making its rounds. He couldn't get out of his skin. Damon would never embody the definition of good. Because when people see good they expect good. And Damon didn't just want to meet other people's expectations. He may have been good at heart but he lived too much for the adventure, the burning passion and the danger and so he couldn't live a boring life like Stefan. Damon snorted in disgust and rolled on his side. Stefan's life wasn't as common as anyone assumed. For a short while, the dark-haired man wondered if he should spread rumors about his little brother. Only that those wouldn't be the untruth. But he immediately rejected the idea. Elena's reaction would be punishment enough for his little brother. And even though he despised the younger Salvatore for his actions, he was still his brother.

Damon straightened himself, stood up and walked to the window, looking out into the night. He didn't know what time it was now but the moon appeared already bright at the nightly sky. He wasn't entirely full but the luminosity of the heavenly body still illuminated the garden of the Salvatores. His thoughts now wandered from the heated discussion with Elena to their second clash last night. A mischievous grin grazed his lips. Well, that anyone would bother him and Katherine while they were screwing wasn't really planned. His girlfriend didn't realised it anyway. He had already thrown her into a delirium at this time. And if Elena hadn't stepped on a rotten branch, or whatever it was that cracked the evening silence, he wouldn't have noticed her presence either. But he had seen her and Elena's gaze, intervowen with innocence and shame but also attraction and a hint of dirty interest, had only made him hornier. At this specific moment, he had known that—despite all the disagreements and despite all the contempt—he liked it to make a lasting impression on her. And for some reason, this ignited a deep, animalistic desire in Damon. He couldn't name what it was but he knew he had to see this expression in her eyes again. That restrained lust, the pretty girl was so ashamed of. And so, a plan started to assume a shape. A plan that not only involved giving Stefan a taste of his own medicine but also to win this innocent girl. Maybe she—and her big heart—were the key?


	8. Author's Note

Dear Delenalovers,

I am so sorry, but I have to tell you that I am currently not able to continue my writing. My personal life took a turn for the worse and I hope you all will be understanding and supporting. I am writing when I am happy and after all that happened in the last few days I'm just not able to focus on a love story when mine is over. I am really sorry.

Love, Ria


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